Senior Entrance – MT18 – University of Michigan Musical Theatre

Senior Entrance – MT18 – University of Michigan Musical Theatre

October 26, 2019 80 By Stanley Isaacs


We are not throwing away our shot We are not throwing away our shot AYO this is senior entrance, we gotta welcome
the freshman And we’re not throwing away our shot Welcome back to school! Enjoy the holiday? And if you’re new then you should know you
won the lottery So let’s begin; We got a couple a’ bits
to cover today We’re breaking the 4th in order to say The class of 21’ is here
It’s time for us to start the year! We are not throwing away our shot We are not throwing away our shot AYO this is senior entrance, we gotta welcome
the freshman And we’re not throwing away our shot You’ve been waiting for this day since fourteen Watching Andrew Keenan Bolger’s YouTube channel every night Hi Andrew! You filmed prescreen after freaking prescreen Essays, SATs, and headshots And you got your cuts just right Every turn you nailed, every note you hit, Every time you failed, you refused to quit. You kept pushing through, hoping to Go Blue,
more than you’d admit Check your phone, check your mail, check again,
wait they called you!! Seven Three Four, that’s Ann Arbor! Take a breath, play it cool, Dean Hoffman! How are you? Tears start to pour You have no idea what Michigan has in store. Mom! Mom! I just got accepted to the musical theatre
program at Michigan! How much is tuition? Oh Um 59,000… 59,000. Nope 59,000? To study musical theatre? 59,000! Please, yo! Imagine me on stage with an ease So? So, I’d be singing out like Louise yo! I promise you will have no regrets For real though, I heard the faculty taught
Gavin Creel Woahhh. I see you’re starting to see the appeal,
so? But the debt? I will sweat for my paycheck.. I’ve been waiting now since May,
I arrived here yesterday And I love Bursley! I’ve got classes in the Moore.
Music Theory- what a bore! But I Love Bursley! They’ve got cookies,
They’ve got fries, And a bus that I despise Just my luck when it’s late I can pass out at 328 Though our groupchat’s still a mess,
It’s my class that I like best, and I love Bursley And my MT’s Just moved here from LA Never seen a snowflake or a snow day or delay Mom got me a thousand dollar coat that weighs
a ton I’ll probably only wear it once Oh yeah? Have fun. Soaking up those autumn days
Cider mills and donuts glazed We’ve just got two words to say: FALL ALLERGIES When temperatures are dropping low,
I’ll uber everywhere I go October may be cute,
but just you wait til winter I can’t wait to Instagram a leaf! (GASP) Maybe a whole tree! We’ll see! Be sure to let us know When you’re feeling low look out your dorm window
And it’s another day of SNOW Why won’t it go away? Holy crap now I’m tired. This has been quite a lot All the work that’s required I never really knew how hard it got But alone you’re not So don’t be fraught because Everyone’s a little bit ratchet sometimes Booking leads and subsequently dropping your lines And your Jacket! Look around and you will find BFA life is a grind Maybe it’s a fact we all should face Everyone has moments We’d erase Everyone’s a little bit heinous sometimes Who’dda thought that puking in an uber’s a crime? Gross Trust us, it is not discreet Your roommate’s really not asleep No one volunteers to be third wheel Don’t do it with your classmates Let’s be real Everyone’s a little bit busted, ya know! I know We Know! They know! Doesn’t mean that you can’t book a big Broadway show! Study hard and try your best! Your talent will do all the rest! Then again there is no guarantee! That’s why you get a Michigan degree! Everyone’s a little bit ratchet! Dear MT21, this year is going to be a good year And here’s why Want home made cookies and spagetti? Give me a call I’ll teach you how to fake an accent and decieve them all Want to get physical? I’ll teach you Grotowski! Or come compare the worlds of Marvel and DC! You have opinions? We can write up a review Or write a musical you can put yourself into You need a rhyme to sing in time with clarity? If you need golden age that is my specialty Come to the diag! See the furry friends I attract Come to the gym! We’ll blast “Soliloquy” while we get jacked If you love Disney We can share our loyalty! And when you’re done with Belle come meet real royalty! The Queen is here! I’ll be your guide to all game days Or leave the game to come pet dogs while wearing blue and maize! When footballs through, come to the club to get your fill! You know I’ll be there showing off my special skill Feel free to call if your apartment has high shelves I drive the MBus so hop on but best behave yourselves! If you’ve got extra Bursley swipes, we should get close We’ll talk about which feminist blog we love the most! I can teach you how to enhance your sound and I started my own magazine! Lit Magazine! Cause all that you need is a little MT18 Our buddies are here and so we’re celebrating! Class of 21′ We made these paper plates to signify our love Enjoy your plate! Hail to the victors valiant Hail to the conquering heros Hail, hail! To Michigan The champions of the west Go Blue! Dearly beloved We are gathered here to say our goodbyes We are leaving, we are leaving Alumni! But before we go We must thank those who taught us all we know And who might think to put us in a show Why of course it is the faculty We raise our glass You bet your ass to The faculty (The faculty) (The faculty)
With Mark you’re in performance Read the inner game of tennis Keep it simple No need to impress! Just communicate! With Jason your cuts are clean Perfect 16 Pop Rock Dad And then there’s Linda Director Human lie detector If we could we’d elect her You will respect her as your professor With her bestie of course Cynthia is fashion fab A broadway conductor A teacher with lots to say Like Lisa! With Stroman combos and ballet And Sarah! Better listen close, she’ll teach you how to tap! With Catherine you’ll march along Your tempo will be set! Wait! Wait. Wait. Wait. Let’s not forget Ron Dejesus Hey movers Stretch! Start stretching now! Ann Evans will teach you to belt Chelsea will also teach you to belt What about Vince Cardinal? He’s our department chair! Vince Cardinal Vince Cardinal! Nationally renowned Vince Cardinal! He’s a champion of Shakespeare He’s got a super cute Chihuahua! He’s the comforting father figure we never had! Someday we’ll recall The greatest “card” of all Vince, I love you! Vince Card- (sniff) -inal! Dear professor, I am so sorry about last class It was a nightmare in every way I will never yawn again while the GYPSY theme plays! Wagner Professor Wagner! Don’t call him Brent til you graduate He’ll teach you how to spell Write thank you notes as well Put names of shows in upper case If you remember these His class will be a breeze We honor the esteemed Professor Wagner Every year, the musical theatre program at
Michigan accepts about 22 new Freshman into our family Now that you’re here, there’s probably
a few things you should know Welcome to the pack if you come from away You probably understand about half of what we say You see we’ve got a language only we can comprehend Here’s a little lesson from your friends at Michigan Welcome to the Pack! So I arrived in Ann Arbor for my freshman year Bright eyed- dance belt in hand, And one of the upperclassmen, comes up to
me and she says Ooh girl, you look GORG What the hell does gorg mean? Soon- I’m hearing all sorts of words I’ve
never heard before like “Frink” and “Fronk.” And as soon as it got cold outside? “Wow, this Winter motif is a moment.” If you hit the gym, you might hear me call
you “Dzaddy” If there’s a good clap-back, you can bet
“I’m dead” If I yell “Come On!” You did something I commend It’s all part of life at Michigan Welcome to the pack! A wolverine, You are a wolverine You’re a wolverine, You are a wolverine I’m a wolverine, I am a wolverine We are wolverines, Yes we are wolverines! We are here At the start of the ending But I’m still late to class And I still can’t touch my toes Here One more year in Ann Arbor At least this is better than Last year’s roast (General Panic) Senior year is here, no time to freak out We graduate in May Get off your ass I have no doubt we’ll finally get our shit
together And don’t you dare forget, We’re the Engelberts’ favorite class We’ve got one year only, one year only Before we’re on our own One year only To pray away the nodes We’ve got One year only, one year only To find a man at Ross One year only, To master my Bob Fosse Eee! One year only, one year only! So here we go racing off to NYC Leading the next generation of prolific Wolverines Here we go Wondering how the world might handle us- We’ll climb our way into the spotlight You’ll see as we hit new heights Our time, this is our moment We’re primed, ready and focused Watch- We’ll pave the way It’s not simple to say Say goodbye to our school And fill up our days With auditions and callbacks Ambitions and fallbacks Remembering what this school gave us We are thankful though we’re stressed We were taught by the best We are smart and well-versed We perform but we’re good people first We are eager to succeed We are focused on our wants and our needs But at days end we know that we’re one in
a beautiful line Of the ones who can say “this was mine” All we see is maize for forever
(used to be mine) No Thai and game days for forever
(always be mine) Feels like we could go on for forever this way (Mine)
All we see is blue for forever
(used to be mine) In all that we do for forever
(always be mine) When we part it’s not for forever You’ll see We’re family We’ve got ties right here for forever We’ve got friends to cheer for forever We’ve got one more year left together